Synastry Secrets: How Black Moon Lilith Shapes Love and Desire

The operation of the natural worlds and fructification of life's full circle is incomplete without these dark energies operating in hindsight.

Both traditional and rigid social standards play a pivotal role in shaping us as humans. They determine our personalities. In the process of fitting ourselves into these norms, we conveniently tend to cover up our darker sides - the aspects that we know would not be accepted by the gregarious society.

Then suppressed deep down like the remnants of a broken ship, how often are we able to accept our darker traits - let alone talk about them?

The Dark Moon Lilith is all about these traits - primarily the ‘forbidden traits’ that we’ve all hidden for so long.

The Black Moon Lilith is not a solid object like planets. It's the geometric point in the Moon’s orbit when it is farthest from the earth. This bleak point, farthest from the earth, stands in total darkness and complete isolation.

Imagine the icy white peaks of Antarctica lolling in total darkness for six months! The Black Moon Lilith is just the same. Tucked away somewhere in the dark, it secretly rules the unknown worlds.

Away from our perception, the Black Moon Lilith marks the bottom of the world. The netherworlds. This point triggers the unravelling of the dark feminine energy that’s cold to male dominance.

In Hebrew folklore, Lilith was the first wife of Adam. Both Adam and Lilith were created from dust, which is why Lilith thought she was equal to Adam.

For not obeying Adam, she was banished from the Garden of Eden. She’s certainly not a well-behaved girl, but a spoilt one who can ruin your life if you try to reign hers.

Lilith’s defiance of the supreme power brought out the rebel in her - the pure bitch that surely doesn't want to be in the care of male force.

Social norms provide order, and the black moon lilith sets out to destroy this order, break the taboos and force out the raw energies that are simmering behind the well-behaved exterior that you’ve kept for people to see.

Standing both in geographic and celestial isolation, Black moon lilith will tear apart your superficiality and pull out the demonic you - the real you.

Sex is the weapon of the Black Moon Lilith. In synastry, she rules libido and so has a direct bearing over the sexual compatibility you share with your partner. Whenever lilith aspects your partner’s planets in his/her chart, or vice-versa, you’ll experience an irresistible magnetic attraction towards him/her.

Lilith's aspects result in intense adulation, strong sexual urges, and a profound need to peep into your partner’s soul. These aspects weave about malevolent magic that is dangerous yet hard to keep out.

Most lilith aspects are wild and dynamic in nature. Sex is the ‘forbidden fruit’, and Lilith usually plays the role of a dirty seductress. Whenever your lilith touches the other planet[s] of your partner or vice versa, she’ll bring out the animal side in you and your partner.

It is not always necessary that the lilith aspects are bad. Whether good or bad, these aspects bring about profound transformation. She is sure to ignite volcanic intimacy but also brings out your fears naked before your partner and vice versa.

This is why Lilith never allows you to play vulnerable and, instead, forces you to rip your fears apart and eventually overcome them. She’ll help us face things that we’ve been hiding away because of fear of society.

Black Moon Lilith is so sexual, and this is why it can also get destructive. If there are lilith aspects around, you could feel an immediate and irresistible pull toward the person you meet.

At the moment, you may not know the reason for this intense pull towards the opposite person [and vice versa], but the lilith operating in hindsight will lead to the unfolding of some intense chemistry even if you or he/her are in a committed relationship.

This is why Lilith is the dirty seductress who can wipe out long-etched morals in no time and spur you into reacting intensively to your sexual urges.

Lilith conjunct/trine/sextile Sun ️ ☀️

The Lilith and the Sun individuals meeting each other results in one of the most transformative chemistries in the Lilith synastry. Lilith is the darker force, and the Sun has the tendency to dominate.

The lilith person abhors being ruled, and the Sun individual can just not give up on his/her tendency to control. A Lilith individual is unpredictable, while the sun person is tied down by the ego.

Whether your Sun touches the lilith of the opposite person or vice versa, this relationship will see the peak of anger, obsession, and intense sexual activity.

You two owing to stark differences, might try to part ways only to find forced being together in unavoidable circumstances. It's like two animals thrown in an enclosure!

For the two of you, it's the guilty pleasure intensified even more by how wrong it feels. This relationship could blossom if the two of you accept each other's differences and celebrate the lilith qualities this aspect brings out.

Sun square/opposition Lilith 🔆

The aspect will bring up an illusive vibe. Decoding each other’s sexual needs will be tough here, more so for the sun individual. The attraction between the two people can never get as fiery as in this aspect.

The power struggles will be immense as the sun individual will never let go of his/her dominance while the lilith person can go fulminating to no end.

The two of you will have an intense need to be with each other the whole time but would also want to break free from the binding shackles this relationship hurls at the two of you.

Moon conjunct/sextile/trine Lilith 🌙

The aspect is certain to bring out hidden emotions in the two of you. A lot of emotional cleansing and healing will follow in this connection, but not before the two of you’ve had a tumultuous ride.

The lilith individual will entice the Moon individual, while the Moon individual could feel intimidated by the lilith individual. Moon is dark, but lilith is certainly the darkest.

The lilith qualities might get a little too heavy for the Moon individual to handle- and this could mark the downfall of the relationship.

Both Moon and Lilith are darker forces ruling the subconscious. This aspect will trigger past emotional wounds buried in the subconscious and intense sexual impulses, almost instantly, in the two of you.

Moon square lilith 🌙

The square aspect between Moon and Lilith is one of the wildest in synastry. Old emotional wounds will come to the fore (most likely, the Lilith individual will bring it up in the moon individual).

Moon is the mother figure, and lilith is the darker force breaking stereotypes. If your lilith is squaring the moon of the other person or vice versa, commitment and consistency will be harder to keep; most of the time, the lilith individual refuses the commitment the moon individual is seeking.

Lilith conjunct/trine/sextile Mars ️ ♂

The bond here is purely that of the Succubus and the Man. For the Mars individual, lilith is a challenge to pursue.

Lilith, the sexy one here, can easily work the powers to entice the aggressive Mars. The attraction between the two is immensely hot and spicy. If the hotness of the sexual activity could be measured in Scoville Scale units, this aspect would turn out to be the most peppery!

The sex life is highly experimental here and often a repeated activity. The two of you find each other irresistibly magnetic, but the relationship is dynamic and unstable simultaneously. This aspect thrives on decoding each other’s sexual drive and coming to terms with each other’s massive ambitions.

Mars square/opposition Lilith ️ ♂

Mars here will have an extremely controlling temperament, and lilith will leave no stone unturned to provoke the destructive Mars. The lilith individual seems to be adept at tempering with the Mars individual's immense sexual drive to get things done.

The Mars individual could turn even more aggressive if he/she feels drained of his power because the lilith individual makes him/her feel so.

Hate sex is one of the most common factors in this aspect. But frequent fights, arguments, and physical assaults could be a common segment of this aspect, leading to a total collapse of the relationship in the due course of time.

Lilith conjunct/trine/sextile Venus️ ♀

The aspect carries an inherent element of romance. The sexual energy will be palpable here and often powerful. Something about the lilith person will make Venus feel sexy and wanted. Like all other lilith aspects, obsession will rule the relationship.

The intense sexual attraction between the two of you could look illogical, but it's still there and is totally inescapable. Good and satisfying sex is the prime indicator of this aspect.

Lilith square/opposition Venus ♀️

An intimate connection, but not without its due share of fears. The sexual intensity is phenomenal here, but the Venus individual could constantly live in the fear of abandonment from Lilith.

The Venus individual could also feel that he/she has to keep proving his/her worth to continue to be in the eyes of the lilith individual.

Sex is nonetheless the forbidden fruit both the Venus and Lilith individuals crave, but the one here is poached (most of the time, it's the Venus individual), and the other is the poacher. Lilith's individual could also be the manipulator here, refusing the commitment the Venus individual is seeking.

Emotion Focused Therapy ️ 🧘‍♀

Lilith is all about everything in excess. Destructive patterns, too, come in excess, with lilith operating in hindsight.

Lilith aspects primarily play around your emotions and distort them to create some overwhelming effect which then shapes your identity.

The darker side of the lilith aspects is that it can lead you to avoid your emotions because they look so wrong. Emotion-focused therapists listen to you with compassion rather than passing baseless judgments.

The core plan of action in this therapy is to make you open to your emotions (both healthy and unhealthy in lilith aspects) and increase acceptance of your feelings.

b class='bold md:text-2xl text-xl g6'>Focus on Solutions 🛠️

Instead of problems, focus on solutions. Lilith aspects, though enticing enough, can cause sufficient tumult in your life.

As a couple, instead of sticking to hollow arguments, focus on finding solutions. If you two see a problem creeping in, set aside your ego and be open to positive discussions.

Express Your Feelings in the Right Way ️ 🗣

Lilith's aspects will bring in both aggression and obsession to an nth degree. It's important to get a clear idea about your obsession/aggression first.

The key lies in being aware. Once you become aware of your own behavior, it will become easier for you to frame your feelings and put them across to your partner.

Reading those major shifts in your behavior will significantly contribute toward helping you express positively and mellowing down the negative effects of the lilith dimension in your relationship.

Strive to Pursue Spiritual Intimacy ️ 🧘‍♂

Connect with your partner on a spiritual level. Lilith is platonic in nature, so she makes you go beyond the mundane cravings of bedroom sex.

Along with physical intimacy, cultivating spiritual intimacy is one of the best ways to crack the extreme energies of lilith aspects.

Meditate with your partner. Couple meditation will enable you to overcome the strenuous issues in your relationship, erase differences, and bring you closer.

Pep Up for Smaller Things and Practice Acts of Kindness ️ ❤

Cook, read, exercise together, give frequent hugs, write thank you notes to each other, play board games - there’s plenty you can do with/for your partner. These small things really matter and will push you both towards deeper self-analysis.

Besides promoting strong self-reflection, these small activities with your partner will open up channels for better communication and enhance intimacy. After all, small things are a big deal in relationships.

Relationships are complex and, needless to say, can upturn our world in no time. Though the story began with Adam and Lilith, the idea of rejecting submission (to the male force) has been at the core since ancient times and has gained further momentum, with women reforming themselves each day.

The reason why Black Moon Lilith is transformative is because it gives you the power to tap into your own darker sides and accept them with unflinching grace.

Lilith's aspects, though dangerous, weave in a significant portion of both tragedy and comedy. It's like a spicy mix where the two people find each other irresistible but repress the idea of coming together to keep societal pressures at bay.

If harnessed, Black Moon Lilith can actually transform the entire dynamics of a particular relationship and the two people involved in it.

It's all about grasping its energies and working towards the awareness of one’s own constitution. The energies that lilith breeds are at extremes and often explosive to handle, but the healthy coping strategies (mentioned above) can positively bring healing and lighten the bang-bang energies of lilith- the witchy mistress.